got an interview at sportsgirl. did i get it? do i really want it? arrr tell me next tuesday tell me!

we're gonna take a walk outside today, we're gonna see what we can find today...

Eveytime Sturt goes to work and i do not :(
i am going to apply for a dream job. Todays was an average dream; Sportsgirl.

Tomorrow The pube.... como pube!


oh yeah and i began my treacherous journey of having a vintage store/things i make store.....
We shall see how it goes.....

tingles and makes me nervous

BECAUSE I LOVE THEM SO VERY MUCH, and hearing this makes me worried they will evaporate away and leave me lonely again...

Dear sam,
Hey! I'm so sorry I haven't done anything about what you did. At first I was too mad to do anything. Later I was just devastated. sam, I'm not sure what you were trying to prove, but if it was a test of if anyone cared, fuck you. The only reason i draw this conclusion is due to the letter ou wrote me. You could of just asked me (like every day). Fucking hell sam, OFCOURSE I CARE.. I AM UR BEST FRIEND. ofcourse I care. sam, I KNOW U REGRET WHAT HAPPENED, it's shit. I wish it never happened too. i know that if i was just there in that moment we would be hugging. WHY? REALLY? YOU..... Fucking hell sam I think of you every single day of my life. What did you expect to happen??????? For me just Move on? You were my BEST FRIEND. you dealt with so much in my life. I miss you SO much. You were my closest friend. Hey, just saying that letter you wrote..... BULL SHIT.
am I even allowed to be mad at you?
You have affected my life SOOOOO much. More than anything. And I just want you back. sam. You were worthier, and I permanently think of how happy you would be in my circle of friends. So much bullshit and we could have survived?!!! My friends would have loved you.... Just like I still do.










sam, you could have never have imagined how much i miss you. if there is a god i will be-able to hug you again.
i love you :)

dear joel,
i just want to say im sorry for the way it ended, like that it had to end.... but it really did need to... best for both of us. We both need fresh starts.
today I went through my room and got rid of everything retaining you. Including a bunch of photos from our europe trip. these photos were unlike most, actual physical photos, taken on the disposable camera. there is one particularly beautiful shot of you and the tiber river. i gave you the negative, because i would want it of it were of me :)
gosh joel, it been so long since we have been over and i don't know what to say, except... all our memories of friendship are forever beautiful. I can never think a bad thing of you because you were my bestest ever friend for so long!
i love you, like i always did, but never in the right way. i want/hope/know :) you will ind a girl perfect for you.
i was not her ;) but we sure were great friends... i hope we still can be (but unfortunately i can be so incredibly naive...)
damnit

but in other news;



yay. Joel, i had found so much happy!!!
I only want you too as well because then we can be friends again :D
god i miss you.
forever your friend,
love cat

i don't know what i want

Winter is halting than melting