This photo was taken way early on in our brief courtship. Taken on For-falls, fresh from falls. Way back when zanibar was billions and alice was fucking josh. Right back to when ash was straight (em was just her uni friend), and J-rome was just that, a-roaming. Back before I had a degree, or apparently any sense. But in all these things that have changed one thing hasn't. YOU.
Way back then I was writing angst blog posts (most since I've deleted after that time you hacked into my account), but fragments remain. The emotions never forgetting still here.
God damn it but, thats not why this photo hurts, burns, white hot burns me. The burn comes from the realisation that i had you, for a fleeting second, you were pulled out of the foam, up onto the shore, long enough to gasp for breath, to breath, to laugh.
I'm a thief, I'm taking forever those fleeting memories, hidden between the death threats and the yelling. My conscious tells me i should leave them. That I should rebury them for the next girl to find and discover. But I love you. I still want them.
Maybe one day I will return them. But not yet. I feel their weight as i try to move on. (is it even possible to be able to move on carrying them?).
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